Create a common language and set of expectations among your team members before there is a crisis.

Reading the same book can help you understand each other when there's something important that comes up. It's OK to talk about hard things such as what you'd like to have happen if you were in a nasty car accident.

• When do you or don't you want life support?
• Who do you want to take care of your cat?

Be curious, not judgmental, and take notes. These will help immeasurably whenever the team is needed.